Wednesday, January 21, 2009

My eyes sting.

I was just writing an email to Mareike about how fucking tired I am. Sleep deprivation? In full swing now.

It would be better if I didn't have "help" staying with me. A week with mother in law and then a week with my mom. I've NEVER had "help" stay with me with the other births and that's how I like it. Let me pass the hell out whenever I need to, but with someone here, I feel that I have to entertain. Well, not entertain like sing and dance, but I just don't feel comfortable sleeping knowing someone else is here. AND, I have a super small house. The guest room was turned into a nursery and since I thought I was awesome to put in an extra bed in that room, the grandmas had just assumed residence there. Um, hello? That's the fucking NURSERY! So I've been dismissed to the couch and the crib is totally untouched still. Lame. I can't believe they all just assumed I had room for them. I love the grandmas, really I do, but I need my baby's room. I can't take sleeping on the couch any longer. And it actually disturbs me a little they don't realize how shitty it is for me to be sent to my living room with my newborn. They close the door at night and have a wonderful night's sleep in an empty nursery. Don't they GET that?

I'm getting myself all riled up.

Baby is sleeping all day and awake for longer periods at night. Makes sense since when pregnant, he used to sleep during the day, lulled to sleep by my movements and noises, only to wake up ready to party all night when all was quiet. He's just following what he's used to, so I just have to get through it.

I'm pumping and my boobies are rockstars. I have quite a supply already frozen, but I can't use that for nighttime feedings just yet. If I have someone feed the baby during the night, I'd still have to get up and pump. If I don't pump, I'd not only have rock hard, over stuffed milk bags on my chest, but I'd be messing with my supply. It's just TOO early to screw with supply. For the first few months, I just have to muddle through and pump/nurse every feeding. No sleeping through feedings if I want to continue to have a great supply.

Breastfeeding is going swimmingly. It's really my favorite part of having a baby. It's hard though. The immense pain during the first week of latching on and then the crazy sharp pain of milk let down sucks, but I'm finally getting past it. And, like I mentioned, I immediately work on my supply, tricking my body into producing twice as much, so I pump ~every single time~ I nurse. I now make enough milk to feed K on only one side and pump 3-4 ounces on the other side. (I make so much because even after K finishes, I pump on that side for another 5-10 minutes, even if empty, tricking my boob into thinking baby is still trying to get more. It's exhausting, but definitely worth it.)

Okay, my eyes hurt too bad to keep looking at the screen. Must shut down.

24 comments:

Denise said...

That is truly weird that they don't understand you need the nursery. I don't get it.

If we lived closer, we could totally have pumping parties. Every 3 hours.

Jason and Samantha said...

Hope you get some much needed sleep. I agree with Denise it is weird that they've kicked you out of the nursery.

Just curious why you aren't in your bedroom?

Rachel said...

Just wondering - have you had milk supply problems in the past? Why do you need to pump with every feeding? I pumped a lot in the beginning, but was told to stop because I was veering well towards over-supply, so I'm wondering how you deal with the discomfort and difficulty with the baby latching on (if you get engorged) because it doesn't sound like you're just pumping to keep up your supply?

I had similar issues with the 'helping grandparents' the first week. Everyone wanted to play with the baby but no one wanted to help me with the laundry or dishes or wake up at night.

Poltzie said...

Nancy, You need to talk to them and get them out of the nursery! Mama needs her sleep!
Sweet dreams!

Geohde said...

I'll tell em to stuff off for you.

Am always v envious of women who have boobs that work ;)

J

Nic said...

I dont understand the grandparents. I say kick them out! That must be the most stupid thing I have heard in a while, them in the nursery, not your baby! Get rid! Also you should not entertain them, they are meant to be there to help you, not the other way round! Glad the boobs are working well though!

eden said...

I love your blog post headings. They are always so literal!

Now what the fuck is up with the grandmas? Fuck that, Nancy! Turf 'em out, man! Do it!

.... And, as a mere mortal, I am quite in awe of your breastfeeding skills. Holy shit.

XOXOXOXOX

Sara said...

Well, that is quite interesting about the grandmas sleeping in the empty nursery. Kind of weird, actually.

I am sorry you aren't sleeping - well, I guess that is par for the course with a newborn. But you should at least be able to/feel comfortable sleeping when baby is sleeping. Sucks...

Take care - and take over the nursery!! LOL :)

jenn said...

Oh hon- If I came to visit (first off I would freaking ask you when you ~needed~ me!) I would never even dream of sleeping in the nursery! Where the hell would I expect the baby to sleep?! That just doesn't make sense to me. I'm sorry you have to deal with it. Now I'm kind of grateful that I will only see the mil for a total of a day tops since she'll only come when the hub's at work. (at least as of right now!)

Yay for rock star boobs though! I hope you get a little bit of rest soon. Try passing out while holding the baby & trying to do some laundry or something... that might give them a hint! ;o)

ssbean said...

I can imagine it would be very hard when you have a newborn sleeping during the day and 2 young children sleeping at night, how things can be very hard. I agree with some of the others that you may really want to talk to the grandparents. If they aren't helping in the way you need them to, then it may be best for them to leave. I have a massive fear of grandma's trying to take over after my girl is born. There will be a total of 4 grandma's and great grandma's involved. All of which have the attitude "my way is the only way." So I have a feeling I will have some issues with the grandma's. Glad the boobs are doing good for you.

Misty Dawn said...

I am so sorry Nancy....I guess they don't get it. Maybe you or DH should mention that the bed was intended for you....

(((((((((HUGS))))))))

I'm glad BF'ing is going well. Get some rest. TTYL

ak said...

Girl, get those grannies an Aerobed or something and move them out of the nursery. Or to the living room where you've been sleeping, I'm assuming it's a sofabed?

That whole situation would frustrate me too! OK, nursery = baby's room i.e. where BABY sleeps! D-U-H!! We know the grannies love us all to death and mean well, but I agree, having them over can certainly turn into more work than anything. Unfortunately, it's my mom, not mil, that drives me insane when she's around. Bless her heart, she wants to help but she drives me nucking futs!!

They'll be gone soon, hang in there. And yay for being a BF champ!

Wordgirl said...

Um Nancy,

Holy gods...if I ever were to become pregnant you are going to have explain all of this sh*t to me in detail because it's such a mystery -- I read the posts and think ...omg, breastfeeding...what the hell?


I love reading your posts and updates -- you don't mind if I use it as a learning tool, right? Luckily my mother and MIL will be so busy with their own schedules (my mother), facials, and tennis games (MIL) that I probably won't even see them...

HAH.

Love,

Pam

areyoukiddingme said...

Time to kick the visitors out! Thanks for coming, you've been so helpful, come back and stay in 6 months or so.

Fortunately, we have a guest room, where my mom stayed. She was going to stay for 2 weeks. It quickly became 10 days, because she was bored with doing my laundry and never getting to hold the baby!

uncomplicateme said...

Ugh, that sucks. It'd be nice if the gma's would offer to take a night shift here and there since they're in his room and all.

Our house is small too, but since B is the first kid, we thankfully kicked the guest room to the basement, but I know if we're still in this house if/when #2 rolls around, the guests are going to have to kick it at a hotel.

Good luck! Hoping K gets his days and nights swapped so you can all get some sleep! *hugs*

Kaci said...

Ugh Nancy - so sorry your MIL & mom don't get it. Time to tell them what you need - if that's for them to sleep on the sofa so you & Karl can get comfy in the nursery, TELL THEM! Seriously - no reason for you to be sleeping on the couch.

(((hugs))) and hooray for boobies!

Krista said...

I agree with the others. Tell them that with the night nursing, you'd like to be in the nursery at night, and they are welcome to use the couch, or you'd understand if they'd rather go home. If your DH is really against saying that, perhaps he'd sleep on the couch, you in Karl's room and let the gma have your room.

Hang in there! Congrats on the awesome milk supply. I'm definitely going to try that method if I have another baby.

Peeveme said...

Sounds to me like you are doing exactly what you need to do even if it's more work now.

I know so many women who say that their milk never came in but they slept all night while their DH gave baby bottles. Cause and effect anyone?

Pumping after feeding is a great tip. I will certainly try it.

Velma said...

My mother has already thought about showing up for 3 weeks (YES -- 3!!!) after the baby is born. I don't think I can take that.

Good job on being a BF rock star. I'm staring this post so I know what to do when the time comes...

Hope you get some much needed sleep soon. You should make those grandmas get up in the middle of the night and feed the baby!!

~~HUGS~~

Jen said...

I hope the grandmas are gone now for your sake. It seems like they should have been the ones sleeping on the couch.

Jenn BG said...

YAY for the awesome supply. I did the same with my boys. It is so worth it. Think of all the frozen milk. I was able to start weaning around 10 months and babies never needed formula because I had enough frozen (deep freezer, so it would still be good) to get them to 1 year. :)

I hope you get some sleep SOON. I remember those nights. I am in the I can't sleep hell of pregnancy (not even uncomfortable yet...just can't stay asleep). I know I NEED to sleep now, but my body will not cooperate. So frustrating!

Jenn

Julie said...

Good job on the pumping! It's a lot of work but as you know, so worth it. I had about 300 frozen bags when I went back to work with Camryn, I think I was a little obssessed :)

Hollie said...

I'm feeling your pain on the lack of sleep. This boy sleeps during the day and stays up at night too. That's nuts about the grandmas. Make them sleep on the couch!!! You need to at least get quality sleep for the few hours of sleep you do get. And you need to try to take at least one nap and let grandmas cook or clean or run errands for you. When my mom comes over here I put her butt to work!

JamieD said...

How is it mothers always have the best intentions but it comes out COMPLETELY wrong.

Hope you get some sleep soon.