Thursday, January 8, 2009

There is no way he'll let me wait.

My OB mentioned if everything about today's appointment went well, "we'll see" about waiting until wednesday. I came in today with high hopes. BPP? Good. Still in exact same breech position, but great movements, practice breathing, good fluid. Placenta is still a bit degraded, but no more than from Monday's u/s. NST? Fabulously reactive. "We'll put your chart on his desk" the nurses say to me as I start to walk out, waving goodbye.

"Wait! We almost forgot your blood pressure check!"

I make small talk as we walk to the little bp/weight check room. ~swoosh~swoosh~swoosh~ the pump goes up. I'm confident it'll be high still, but stable as it's been in the past week. Nurse stoic looks at me. "158/100".

Shit.

My doc put me on partial bed rest when diastolic was over 80. He put me on complete bed rest (with my first pregnancy) when diastolic hit 90. When it hit 100, I was to meet him in the hospital within hours, to start the induction to deliver. What do you think 158/100 is going to buy me? It's certainly not going to allow me to get another week down the road.

This is my assumption here - as I am not an obstetrician (really, i'm not) - is he's going to call me tomorrow late morning after his rounds. He's already going to have a time I'm to show up at the hospital the next morning. He's going to try to perform the version, a lighter version of the version (heh, I've been waiting to mix those words) due to the risky nature of the cord. If he's successful, he'll start the induction with some cervidil. I wasn't effaced at all, so I don't see them going straight for pitocin, but again, the whole I'm not a doctor thing will play a role. If he is not successful, I'll be scheduled straight away for a c-section. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if I'm scheduled for the c-section before we even try the version.

Tomorrow will most likely be my last day of pregnancy. I'll only be 38 weeks. Don't they have to make sure his lungs are mature enough? Or is that at 37 weeks? There is a very good survival rate at 38 weeks gestation, I know that. But I still worry. I still worry his done button hasn't popped yet. I am so freaking aggravated I'm going to have to give birth 2 weeks early. I'm not upset with it, as I understand the reasons are for both his survival and even my own. I'll have to remember I got to go into labor all on my own with Allison. And I'll force myself to remember how 3 days worth of pre-labor sucked. How 6 hours before Allison was born I was only 1 cm.

I just realized I am still thinking I'm going to have a vaginal birth, but I probably won't. And a c-section is going to be necessary. Pros of a c-section - less pain. Labor and delivery hurts. A lot. And I can get my tubes tied. And the risk of cord detachment during delivery and me bleeding to death is mitigated. So I have to deal with a harder, much harder recovery. It may make breastfeeding a little harder due to my milk not coming in right away. I'll be okay. Karl will be okay.

I had an acupuncture appointment today to try to get baby to turn. He's still as breech as he ever was, but it was a fabulously relaxing appointment. I had the needles in my ears, hands, knees, calves, ankles and toes. He then lit some herb smoke stick of some kind and once it was smouldering, he took turns holding it against the needles in my toes until they were too hot for me to take. He did this for 15 minutes and then left me in the room to relax. This is where it gets weird. I am not the relaxation type. I talk during massages. I talk during treatments. When left to my own accord in acupuncture sessions, I have to listen to my ipod or have a clock to watch. Left to my own devices, I go nuts. But today? It was blissful. I drifted in and out of consciousness. I couldn't even tell I was sleeping had it not been for the dreaming. It was wonderful. He came in after a few moments and informed me I had been in there for over an hour. Crazy.

I have to go get my swollen feet up. I'll update you when I hear from my doc tomorrow. Oh, and I have to tell you all of the story of how I almost punched a little 6 year old girl in the face. Seriously. Until later ...

19 comments:

Cara said...

Congrats and 38 weeks is perfection. I had two that came at that milestone - one by her own choice and one by ours (neurosis after a 40 week loss and all)

They are the vision of perfection!

Karl- Can't wait to welcome you to the world!!

jenn said...

Oh mama- enjoy your last day. Do all the preggo things you want to do. That thing I have for you will have to get there once Karl & you are back home, especially since I haven't finished yet!

I know how much harder your recovery will be, but I hope it's not too bad for you. You have a wonderful hubby & you can always call me crying (or snarking!) about anything you want!
I will be thinking about you all day tomorrow- text me when you know what's happening if you can. I get picture mail too... And seriously- if there is anything I can possibly do from the other side of the country, just let me know.
<3 xoxoxo love you hon & while it would be nice if he got to finish baking just a little bit longer- I can't wait to 'meet' Karl!

Rachel said...

Both of my babies were induced for medical reasons, Ceara at 36 weeks and Mr. Farty at 38. Neither had breathing problems. I think everything will be fine, and I can't wait for the pics!

alison said...

I'm sorry things aren't going like you wished sweetie. The good thing is it sounds like you're in great care and I'm confident you'll get to meet Karl at the exact right moment,

I think the determinatin of lung maturity differs with dr's but for what it's worth our hospital considers 38 weeks full term and won't do any pre-checking for maturity as they consider it to be more harm than good. They said 37w6d to 37w is decided case by case. Big hugs. Hang in there.

Jen said...

I can't wait to hear the news... Wishing you all the best whenever Karl comes into the world!

MrsSpock said...

You know, I tried and tried to get my son to turn into an anterior position the last month of my pregnancy, and in the end, that "bad" posterior position was what was keeping the blood flow adequate. When he turned into the "right" position, that's when he stopped moving.

Just this ding-dong's opinion, and feel free to discount it, but sometimes they stay where they are because it's the best thing for them...

38 weeks usually is just fine and dandy...

Wordgirl said...

Hang in there momma...

I will be with you in spirit -- it's all such a new world to me I feel so helpless -- not much to add here except that I love you and you and Karl are in my thoughts...


Xo

Pam

Motel Manager said...

That little six-year-old girl must have had it coming. :)

I wouldn't worry too much about milk coming in after c/s -- even though I had low supply, my milk came in promptly, and that has been true for almost 100% of my c/s pals.

And I think that the blood pressure thing is really not to be messed with -- for your sake and for his -- so while 38 weeks may not seem optimal, it does seem like you're getting very appropriate medical intervention.

I love acupuncture -- it's so relaxing!

Will be thinking of you!

Becca said...

First, 38 weeks is ok - it is more than ok, it is considered full term. Karl is telling you he is done cooking- he is breech, his placenta is starting to fall apart and he is raising your blood pressure. He is done, Mom.

That being said, I understand the mourning of the loss of the last two weeks of pregnancy. My darling Joseph insisted he wanted to come early, he was tranverse lie at 37 weeks, 6 days and when I went for my amnio, my labor started before they got the needle in, so he really was ready, but I was not - I mourned the loss of my last two weeks of my last pregnancy, but I got over it.

C-sections do suck but as a BTDT, I can tell you the recovery after being in labor for 36 hours with the first was MUCH harder than the c-section that happened right away.

I wish you peace with whatever birth experience you have and I wish a beautiful little boy that will complete your family will find his way into your arms safe and sound.

Take good care!

Kathy said...

Congrats!! and Cara is right 38 weeks is great!! both of mine came at 38 weeks and were perfect!!

can't wait to see the pictures!!

Anonymous said...

Good luck and I just gotta say that a c-section is not that bad!! I've had 2 (after unsuccessful labor for 2 days) and really they were easier than the whole labor thing! I think I have a biased view. =) Recovery really isn't very hard for most people. I was walking around without much pain the next day. I just followed all the instruction the nurses and docs gave me.

Kymberli said...

38 weeks is perfectly comfortable. Anything 37 weeks and up is considered full-term. My twins were delivered via scheduled c/s right at 37 weeks. We all came home healthy and happy 2 days later. My youngest was born at 38w3d and she was perfect - no issues whatsoever. Enjoy your last day of pregnancy, and whichever way Karl makes his appearance, I still hope that it's more amazing than you ever expected it to be.

Kelly said...

Wow Nancy! I can't believe its time already!

Karl is done...he's been giving you signs!

Good luck! Can't wait to see pictures of your new beautiful baby! (((Hugs)))

ak said...

38 weeks is fine.

I understand that with an 'elective' and/or repeat c-section many docs will not schedule before 39 weeks without first performing an amnio to verify the lungs are mature enough. 39 weeks and later, they don't bother. This is what my doc is telling me and this is our current debate, as I mentioned earlier.

However, in your case, there are medical reasons they are delivering him at 38 weeks, so I don't think it matters either way. For your well being and his, he needs to come out pronto. But you can always ask your OB if this is a concern.

Again, he should be just fine. You are at term. Again, my first decided to make his debut at 37 weeks (my water broke, then labor had to be induced, then needed an emergency C) but again, he was fine! No lung/breathing issues, or any other issues for that matter.

Enjoy your last day of being preggo, especially since you intend for this to be your last baby. Try not to think about the whole version/c-section drama, and enjoy the last day of having your little one in you. It is special and bittersweet in a way I imagine. But just take it easy and soak it all in.

Here's hoping your recovery if you do have a c-section is quick and easy. I must say, the recovery after mine was not as bad as I expected. Of course, I don't have a vaginal delivery to compare it to, and so I don't know what it's like to be up and about the next day, but still. It really isn't the end of the world.

HUGS! Can't wait to hear about the birth and see Mr. drama himself. :)

ak said...

One more thing... honestly, if I were you, and this is just my opinion, I would think about skipping the version altogether and just see if the man wants you to have the section right then and there.

I know you are still holding on to the hope of a vaginal delivery, but I've heard mixed things about those versions. You stated that the doc has to do a modified verison because of the cord issue. Well, if 'regular' versions don't have a terribly high success rate, wouldn't it then drop even little more with the 'light version'

Again, I know your mind is racing as it is, and I'm not trying to stress you, but if it were me, I'd just have them go in and get Karl out without subjecting myself to extra procedures which may potentially pose a risk, albeit a small one.

Again, HUGS and good luck with whatever goes down!

nancy said...

ak - yes, it's even less of a chance at success, BUT - it's a chance. With all the low statistical chances I had with this entire pregnancy (ivf/fet/lining/low beta/ectopic, etc ...) I'm not going to skip something just because there is less of a chance! :)

Geohde said...

38 weeks is term by a week, I'd be surprised if anybody was risking an unnessecary needle through your abdomen for lung maturity testing.

If it ends up a c-section, you probably already know there's a slight risk of TTN- wet lung because the baby hasn't been, ahem, squeezed by your 'birth canal' (why do they never call it a vagina in this context? It ruins the Temple in hetero men's minds perhaps?). But that's usually a fiarly minor thing.

Good luck m'dear and I'll read you on the other side :)

J

Sugar and Ice said...

If it makes you feel any better, when I expressed concern to my lactation consultant about the possibility of my milk not coming in quickly because of having a c-section, she said that was nonsense. She said a lot of people seem to think that, but she assured me it was unfounded. She says the body knows it is time to kick milk production into action once the placenta is delivered, regardless of whether it is done vaginally or via c-section. It was true for me...didn't take any longer for my milk to come in with the twins than it did with LG.

Kim said...

((HUGS)) Nancy, I am sure Karl will do great! I can tell you over the last 7.5 weeks of NICU hell, I have seen ONE term baby come in for a couple of hours, and right back out. That baby had some blood issue.

I had a c/section and my milk came in before I even left the hospital, and I have defective boobies.

I am sure you both will do great! I will have you in my thoughts tomorrow.