Sunday, December 28, 2008

Weird dreams and porn.

I had a night full of weird dreams. Apparently I wanted to buy a shark. A great white. They come live from the store but I think I wanted to eat it or something, because I was worried I wasn't going to be able to slaughter it correctly. It ended up costing too much though - $500.49 for the shark itself, but then I was going to have to hire a tribe of indigenous people (indigenous to where, I'm unsure) to perform a ceremony on the shark before I would be able to purchase it. I decided that was just too much to spend and I passed.

The dream was also part nightmare, as someone was trying to "get" me in the classic way my dreams always go (I'm in the house and know someone is trying to get in, but I can't see them nor stop them. Then the lights go out and I can't turn them back on, so everything is in shadows.) It took place in my parent's house - the one they had while I was in Jr High and High School, as the venue of where many of my dreams take place. Another recurring theme was I tried to make something to eat, but all the food in my parent's kitchen was rotten.

It had new elements too. One was I had to wipe Allison's butt in the bathroom which was mine in jr high and high school, except the inside of the bathroom was totally different. I couldn't get her clean so I put her in the bathtub. While she was in the bathtub, Tom's late grandmother came in and she looked ~so good~ (she had been going downhill for years before her death, so we saw the progression of death) and she said something that now is VERY weird. She said "Sometimes all you need is a hot bath and a vicodin to make everything better" - meaning that's what she just did to make herself look and feel so good.

Why is that weird?

Because of this post from The Captain's Wife. It was something I read last night and for some reason, I dreamt about it. But that is NOT what was weird. I bring in my reality into dreams all the time. The weird thing was this ... if you would read the comments for my last post about grammar, She dreamed about MY post last night too. Neither of our posts were anything exciting enough to dream about, but we both dreamt about eachother's words. How fucking strange is that??

Warning for anyone who may stop by my house ... (laurel, i guess this only applies to you). I'm on a naked kick. The kids are out of the house and I've been naked since yesterday afternoon. I am wearing panties as I don't think anyone should be sitting around on their furniture on bare asses. Laurel and her husband are those types of friends who never need to knock, even when coming unannounced. They can just walk right in. And they will be in for a little more than they bargained for if they walk in now. I'm trying to make sure the door is locked, but Tom uses the front door too, so I can't guarantee it.

It all started because I put some lotion on. I ended up taking off everything to get the full body slather going on and due to the lotion being a thick cream, I didn't put my clothes back on right away. And then I realized how great it feels to be naked. And there you have it. I'm a born again nudist. (I guess I'm not actually a nudist since I wear panties, but close enough for me, so I'm going with it.) I used to walk around naked all the time when I moved out of my parent's house, into my boyfriend's apartment. But I think I did it more then to just constantly tease him with my bold nakedness. And that I was a little self conscious due to my boy-like body, so I was basically forcing him to notice me. Now I'm doing it strictly for the comfort, as there is no compliments to fish for with a body like mine right now. Not that I think I'm ugly - I'm simply not "sexy" at the moment. I feel ultra feminine, but let's just say I'm not expecting to catch my husband's "omg, let's do it now" look from my naked spectacle.

11 comments:

chicklet said...

NOBODY should sit bare-assed on furniture. I whole-heartedly agree. Nakedness in all other ways is a good thing. Clothes are just not that comfortable, no matter how baggy they are or how low they sit.

jenn said...

Naked is wonderful! But even nudists always carry a towel- bare asses on furniture is just rude.

Sarah R said...

In reply to your comment, I would eat pancakes if I were starving, but I would rather load up on salty stuff over sweet stuff. Bacon and sausage--bring it on! When we went on trips in the past (all-inclusive), my breakfast every morning was a huge plate of bacon and some fruit. I have never been a fan of pancakes or waffles.

Cara said...

Ah- yet another classic Sex in the City flashback just graced my visual mind. Maybe I'll dream about THAT tonight!

Nancy - you never cease to keep me laughing! Thank you!!!

Sarah R said...

As I leave another non-post realted comment on your blog (hehe)...Those are some damn fancy waffles you made for Christmas--wow!

When we were kids, we preferred butter and sugar on our pancakes, not syrup. It is delicious!

The Captain's Wife said...

Creepy....

I also am on a naked kick. I don't know Nancy...sometimes you and I are on the exact same level and yet we are 3000 miles apart.....

T just read your post with me and cracked up at the naked part since I have pretty much refused to wear clothes tha last couple of days...cooking and cleaning in no more than panties and a sports bra..

jenn said...

ps- I put a pic up & answered you on mine...

I knew you'd want to see one & had to run up & take one! ;o)

eden said...

OMG you are so fucking hilarious! Who writes that they are walking around naked? Apparently YOU.

You can sit on furniture naked ..... if you are a fifty year old bald fat guy named Norm, who owns 10 cats in a cockroach-infested flat, beating off to porn all day. ;)

sara said...

Oh Nancy you are too funny! I had to giggle at the title. I have to say I'm a total horntoad because my hubby and I haven't been able to have nooky since last March. Gasp! I can't believe I just admitted that...IVF then placenta previa then cerclage and preterm labor...well you get the drift. But we finally hopefully will get the green light this week....so your title gets me all excited, LOL!

WISHING...HOPING...and PRAYING said...

you are so funny!

Krista said...

I always have really strange dreams when I feel stressed, or have stress that I don't realize I'm having.