This is just too funny not to share here.

I usually would put the funny stories about things my children say on my other blog (listed in my profile) but this one was just too funny to keep to the smaller audience.

First off, let me explain I do not keep anything from my children. I mean, I don't share problems and adult-only conversations, but I will explain anything they ask. They've asked me how the baby is going to come out and they know the medical explanation. I explained every step of the way during our IVF and FET journey. I showed them the "baby eggs" picture of the original Mod Squad and then the Fab Four when they were transferred in me. I explained we hoped they would grow into babies we would bring home, but also stayed very realistic about how chances are they would die. I explained how this is not how all babies are made, but mommy's belly was hurt once, so we needed help from our doctors.

I was always amazed how well they took in the information. When I explained we wouldn't be having all four babies (~whew!~), Ella looked genuinely sad for her lost potential brothers and sisters, but she also showed her excitement towards the one baby we were growing. Even now, she knows we may not be able to take Karl home with us, but our doctors are taking really good care of mommy so he will be born healthy.

For us, "protecting" our children seems like we're just setting them up for bigger disappointment later on. So we have decided, as parents, to answer any questions as they arise, but more specifically, answer them truthfully. When Great Grandma died, she didn't go "to sleep". She died. When they questioned how the baby will come out, I drew a picture of my uterus and cervix and explained how the cervix will open up when the baby is ready and then I'll have to push him out through my vagina. They take it all in very matter of fact and it's awesome. Of course, we don't tell them things they just shouldn't know now, like sex, but I'm sure we do tell most than most parents do. Maybe I'm wrong though, maybe most parents give this much information.

On to the funny story ...

Ella (4 years old) was asking about what happens to dead people. I explained the difference between burial and cremation. I explained what the coffin looks like and how it all works. I explained all the steps in cremation, including the fire burning all parts of our bodies into ash. I approached it slowly, as to not scare her, and was able to explain why it's not scary and why it doesn't hurt. I told her when I die, I want to be cremated and have my ashes sprinkled into the ocean. She was okay with that and we went on with our day.

Later, while on the phone with Grandma, I hear her say, out of the blue, "Guess what? When Mommy dies, we're going to set her on fire and throw her ass into the ocean."

I almost peed myself. I probably would have if I could have seen Grandma's face.