Weight.

I decided against the post I was going to post because, well, it's been done before. Even though I have an additional opinion about it, I really don't want to have to start from square one and talk through all the same responses again.

But I've got another one, less controversial, but still, bugs the hell out of me.

Weight. Namely the weight gain during pregnancy.

Good lord, I see ~so many~ freaking "omg! I gained 3 lbs" messages and on the other side "I've only gained 2 lbs this whole pregnancy! I'm awesome!" messages, I'm about to go insane. Of course I don't respond to these, except maybe to calm down someone who has gained.

I'm relatively thin. I've been super skinny most of my life, but things changed a bit when I got older. My "normal" when I eat like crap everyday is about 10lbs overweight. If I watch what I eat and exercise, I can be at my body's "perfect" weight. And then there is the size 1 weight I can achieve when I stop eating, but that wasn't on purpose, it was stress induced. So now you know my background.

I can understand those scared posts, worrying about their weight gain. That's why I try to calm down their fears. Yes, 25-30 lbs is what a doctor would suggest a woman carrying a singleton to gain. But some women's bodies simply don't know that rule. ~I~ gained 50 lbs EACH pregnancy! Sure, my OB gave me "the talk" but when I lost it all within the first few months, he was cool. When I gained again with baby #2, he said "that's what your body needs to do". Of course you won't know what your body needs to do when it's your first pregnancy. But if you are eating relatively well, you can bet you are gaining the appropriate weight the baby needs.

I also realize that for people who have struggled with their weight for years, even the recommended weight gain can be a very scary prospect. So I acknowledge this is something I simply don't have any experience with, so I can't judge.

But then there are the women who gloat about "I only gained 2 lbs and I'm 38 weeks!". (Here comes the controversy...) These messages literally piss me off. I ~want~ to say "yeah, but how much did you weigh when you started??"

A woman who is overweight is expected to gain less than someone within normal ranges. And a woman who is overweight and suddenly becomes a healthy eater when she sees that BFP may actually lose bad weight while gaining baby weight, so her weight may stay static throughout the pregnancy, even sometimes showing a decrease.

And that's great! BUT, when you are on a public message board, gloating about how you only gained 2 lbs may actually be causing harm for others. Let me explain.

Based on statistics from the CDC, 25% of Americans are considered very overweight. So for the argument, let's say this percentage is the same for pregnant women. Of these 25%, many aren't going to have to gain that much during pregnancy due to their energy stores. And many will actually lose weight or break even.

When these women do their weight gloat, whom do not mention how much they weighed at conception, the other 75% of women see this and they worry about their own weight gain. And whammo. That's when you see women freaking out over gaining 2 lbs in 4 weeks.

Look, I totally get the idea that when a women is drastically overweight, the idea of NOT gaining is huge. I understand that losing bad weight during a pregnancy is something to be personally happy about. But please, without stating the fact they didn't have to gain during pregnancy is not helping out the 75% of women who should gain.

It is quite unfortunate that skinny=beautiful is drilled into little girls as soon as they open their eyes. America is terrible in giving so many women bad body issues. It sucks and I definitely agree. But it just boggles my mind that the women who are most likely struggling with their own body issues are the reason so many other women are crying over their very normal weight gain. And maybe they will start restricting themselves which in turn leads to the baby not getting the amount of nutrients it needs.

Like I said, I think it's great when someone who has a little more bread in the oven can lose weight or not gain during pregnancy. But to make it sound like that's a good thing for everyone? I find it a little misleading.

Be proud for yourself! But just make sure it's not taken out of context.