I Feel Like Such a Fool.

There are some things in my life, personal and professional, I would like to keep private, yet there are parts of some things which really effect me and I need to "get it out". Blogging is my way of getting it out, so there are times I will have to be cryptic as to not put too much of a personal thing out there. This is one of those times.

In a nutshell, everything about this situation boils down to me being played for a fool. Nothing was done to me maliciously, but when my direction started going down a path which wasn't the right way to go, something should have been done right then and there to redirect me. Instead, I was taken advantage of and I was left to clean it all up on my own.

Things could have been redirected months ago. Someone who knew the lay of the land, the forest ranger, was right there and watched me turn the wrong way. But it was convenient for him to have me walk down that path, as he has to verify the path was walkable. So with me walking it, he didn't have to walk it himself. When I turned down the wrong path, casually on my way, it was obvious to him I was taking the wrong path for my juorney. Instead of warning me, I was left to try to navigate it on my own. I had gone down that path a long distance for a great while, not knowing I couldn't get to where I was going, but thinking I could.

It wasn't until the forest ranger's boss paid a visit and the ranger, wanting to look ~good~ in front of his boss, suddenly swooped in to tell me I was going in such the obvious wrong way, I should be ashamed of myself. I was made to look really stupid in front of his boss. The ranger immediately took me out of there and showed me the starting point of the right path, under the nodding approval of his boss. As his boss was patting him on the back, the ranger winks at me and says "Thanks for not telling on me!" and I'm left standing alone at the beginning of the new path.

So here I stand. The fool. I wasted so much time on the wrong path, unbeknownst to me. The ranger had been with me the entire time while I was on the other path, wasting my time and most importantly, my energy. At least I know I'm on the right path now and I will get to my destination, but it's a small consolation when thinking of everything I had wasted. And it's even a bit harder to chew when I turn around and the ranger's boss is high-fiving the ranger for a job well done, rewarding him with a promotion for his dream job.

Fucking lame.

The ranger should have put me on the right path as ~soon~ as he saw me going down the wrong path. He shouldn't of used me for his own gain. And he definitely should not have kept what he did to me a secret to his boss.

All I can draw energy on from now is karma. The ranger may have a temporary ego boost from this all but things will catch up to him. Maybe not today. Maybe no tomorrow. But someday it will catch up to him.