Monday, October 27, 2008

I Feel Like Such a Fool.

There are some things in my life, personal and professional, I would like to keep private, yet there are parts of some things which really effect me and I need to "get it out". Blogging is my way of getting it out, so there are times I will have to be cryptic as to not put too much of a personal thing out there. This is one of those times.

In a nutshell, everything about this situation boils down to me being played for a fool. Nothing was done to me maliciously, but when my direction started going down a path which wasn't the right way to go, something should have been done right then and there to redirect me. Instead, I was taken advantage of and I was left to clean it all up on my own.

Things could have been redirected months ago. Someone who knew the lay of the land, the forest ranger, was right there and watched me turn the wrong way. But it was convenient for him to have me walk down that path, as he has to verify the path was walkable. So with me walking it, he didn't have to walk it himself. When I turned down the wrong path, casually on my way, it was obvious to him I was taking the wrong path for my juorney. Instead of warning me, I was left to try to navigate it on my own. I had gone down that path a long distance for a great while, not knowing I couldn't get to where I was going, but thinking I could.

It wasn't until the forest ranger's boss paid a visit and the ranger, wanting to look ~good~ in front of his boss, suddenly swooped in to tell me I was going in such the obvious wrong way, I should be ashamed of myself. I was made to look really stupid in front of his boss. The ranger immediately took me out of there and showed me the starting point of the right path, under the nodding approval of his boss. As his boss was patting him on the back, the ranger winks at me and says "Thanks for not telling on me!" and I'm left standing alone at the beginning of the new path.

So here I stand. The fool. I wasted so much time on the wrong path, unbeknownst to me. The ranger had been with me the entire time while I was on the other path, wasting my time and most importantly, my energy. At least I know I'm on the right path now and I will get to my destination, but it's a small consolation when thinking of everything I had wasted. And it's even a bit harder to chew when I turn around and the ranger's boss is high-fiving the ranger for a job well done, rewarding him with a promotion for his dream job.

Fucking lame.

The ranger should have put me on the right path as ~soon~ as he saw me going down the wrong path. He shouldn't of used me for his own gain. And he definitely should not have kept what he did to me a secret to his boss.

All I can draw energy on from now is karma. The ranger may have a temporary ego boost from this all but things will catch up to him. Maybe not today. Maybe no tomorrow. But someday it will catch up to him.

15 comments:

Hollie said...

I'm sorry you were put into this position. I like to think my co-workers/friends/family will steer me into the right direction, but knowing that someone led you astray when they could have helped you... not good. I hope you get on the right path soon. And know that if you unknowingly, accidentally got on the wrong path, then you can't beat yourself up too much. Nobody is perfect.

Morgan Owens said...

Fucking ranger man (whoever you are talking about)..I hope he shoots his self in the foot with his gun. Karma definately IS a bitch.

Not in the Water said...

co workers suck sometimes...and hopefully Karma is waiting around the corner :)

Sorry you feel like a fool.

Sara said...

Well, sounds shitty. I am sorry! Assholes suck...

Jules said...

yikes Nancy, I'd love to hear this story, the full version. Sounds like corporate crap but I can be for sure. And I'm sorry you got caught in the middle of whatever it was.

Anonymous said...

Im so sorry Nancy. Sounds like you got a bum deal. If it was me I would def tell on that stinky rangers ass to his boss. Its certianly not fair for you to take the blame for something when you werent 100% at fault in it. I hope your day gets better sweetie. (HUGS)

Birdee said...

That's a great story, love the metaphor, but do we get to know what? Is it something here that we should know to have stopped you from? or is it in your work life? I'm by all means not asking for the nitty gritty if you don’t want to give it, but if it's something your blogger friends should have brought to your attention and didn’t. I'm sorry.
If it's work related though, I totally understand. Been there - done that. Unfortunately when/if they get theirs. I don’t get the privilege to watch. I just have to trust they will get theirs - but I still feel like the joke.

sara said...

Well, yes while cryptic - I understand the need for some privacy, but also to vent at the same time. You are one good chick and I would gladly kick the butt of anyone who hurts a girl like you. Just send them my way... (well...I would try at least, LOL!) In the meantime - I hope things work out as best as possible for you and I'll keep you in my thoughts ((hugs))

Anonymous said...

yep, Karma's a bitch. I'm going to send Yogi Bear after that ranger.

Mermaid said...

I'm sorry you are in that situation. The ranger will get his in the end. I don't know if this is professionally related, but in my profession, this guy is very typical. Screw someone over at the drop of a hat, even if it isn't maliciousness but negligence. Don't let someone like this make you feel like a fool. You are not.

Elana Kahn said...

Man, that bites! Some people really deserved to be flicked off sometimes, you know? And I second what Morgan said!! I'm definitely hoping karma gives you a good turn and him a really, really bad one.

MrsSpock said...

This sounds like the daily complaint my husband makes about work. People like that suck.

Mareike said...

Nancy, dear Nancy. You will be fine. More than fine. A fool, you are not. Feeling a fool, well, I guess you are. Know and believe the good person that you are and fuck anyone who makes you feel differently. Shit happens. Love yourself, don't harbor regrets and don't let anyone allow you to doubt yourself.

Sarah said...

No matter what shenanigans you get yourself into, we still love you, Nancy! No judging here. :)

Rita said...

I have been around long enough to see some karma come back to those who purposely use others as stepping stones ...
hope the karma shoots him in the ass