Saturday, February 14, 2009

"Michael Phelps' Bong Hit"

While waiting in the ER last night, I hear CNN say "Next, more on Michael Phelps' Bong Hit."

Good lord, why is this news? Who the fuck cares if Michael Phelps is taking bong hits? He wasn't taking them during the olympics. He's on ~vacation~. Let the boy smoke pot if he wants to. Let loose. He wasn't smoking crack for goodness sake.

You know, I actually give the guy ~more~ props for doing so well and being a pot smoker. Most potheads just hang out on the couch and eat chips. This guy was out winning gold medals! Go Michael! He should get another medal just for that.


Ali said...

Amen, sister!

Jason and Samantha said...

Totally agree with you. I don't get why its news.

Sarah R said...

Shit, I wish I could swim that well!

I agree. The real focus on criminals should be on murderers, child molesters, and abusers.

Elana Kahn said...

I so agree. They even confiscated the bong and I think arrested some of the parties involved. How idiotic...

Ella said...

Amen! I couldn't agree more.

areyoukiddingme said...

Because the moral majority will not accept any answer to "You've won 8 Gold Medals in the Olympics, what are you going to do next?" other than "I'm going to Disney World." (Granted, "I'm going to hit a bong" doesn't quite have the same ring, but...)

Alternatively, Wheaties is foolishly overlooking product linking between pot smoking (munchies) and Wheatie eating. Clearly a bad marketing decision on their part.

Tigger said...

Mentioned this to the husband. Turn out that Michael Phelps is part of a group of Olympians who is adamantly promoting the "stay clean, don't do drugs" message...and is getting caught smoking pot. So I'm guessing it's the hypocrisy that's the biggest problem.

jenn said...

As most of his endorsements are munchie related foods (wheaties, subway, etc) I would think this would just be a boon to them & they would continue to support him. Was is dumb to get caught in a photo mid-hit? Yup. Is he a normal 23 year old in many more aspects than people realize just because he happened to win more gold medals than anyone else? Of coure he is! The poor kid worked his ass off- did his country proud & then celebrated by dating a bunch of girls & partying it up a bit. And he did immediately come clean (so to speak) & apologize. I give him lots of credit for that.

(now- explain to me why Jessica Simpson looking hefty in 'mom jeans' was actually on real news?!)

margelina said...

LOL, I know, right?! What baffles my mind most is...not just him but all these very public figures do crap at random parties where God knows who is picture taking. If you are gonna do it, don't do it in public.
Doubtful he's the classic "pothead", where toking up is not a lifestyle. Christ, I bet those cnn anchors smoke up, too!

margelina said...

I just saw Elana's comment...confiscated the bong?! For what?? DNA testing? They'll probably smoke their wacky tabacky with it. They need to focus on the real crime and violence and leave the stoners alone!

Amanda said...

I couldn't agree more. Everyone needs a chance to do their thing.

Sara said...

Totally agree. Nothing wrong with a little pot smoking - it isn't like he was smuggling drugs into the country.

Side note - so many swimmers are complete pot heads. Trust me - I was a competitive swimmer for years and know my way around a bong! LOL :)

Mareike said...

This is a subject dear to my heart. I could write a book on it. I won't go into details but my son is currently incarcerated for possession. He's one of the kindest most wonderful people I know and he would never harm nor steal from anyone yet he may get a sentence far harsher than people who have done those other things. There are many other fine people in a similar situation.
When will the ridiculous federal marijuana laws be changed? I live in California and we have "dispensaries" (there is one two blocks from my house) where people can go, with a reccommendation from a doctor, to buy marijuana. About once a year the DEA raids two or three dispensaries, confiscate all of the product, all cash on hand, all of their computers and all of their records. No arrests are made and generally the dispensaries re-stock and are open for business a few days later.
Our president (my hero) admits to having smoked as well as having done some harder drugs. Likely a significant number of judges, prosecuters, arresting officers etc. Have "smoked up" at some time in their life. It's nuts!!!
Well I guess I've said enough. Thanks for bringing this up Nancy.

JamieD said...

The thing about this that frustrates me is - don't we have other, more serious problems to focus our time and energy on?

Come on. He's a 23 year old super star, for Christ's sake. I'm sure taking a hit off a bong is the least of what he's done in his spare time.

Cara said...

First and foremost - you spend far too much time in that freakin ER!

And - Michael is "on a break" as they say - rock out and have fun!

Rachel said...

Can they go out and catch some REAL criminals for a change??? Ok, so I don't think that kids should smoke pot, but all the money spent on this media fiasco could be spent on something worthwhile, like after school programs for low income neighborhoods, rehab centers, etc.

~*JaYmE*~ said...

I hear ya. More power to him!

mommybird said...

It's news because people who have no lives have to make themselves feel better by looking down on someone who is apparantly perfect because they are famous. Pathetic, but true.

Now if someone gets hurt because he's irresponsible that's different, but come on, it's his time off and he's 23 years old give the kid a break please.

Shinejil said...

I also don't see the evil in a bong-hitting swimmer who trains 10 hours a day or whatever. Got to unwind somehow...

I'm sorry you've been hit by a serious of misfortunes. I hope this is the end of them, and that your back feels better soon.

Thanks for your good wishes! Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Chelle said...

LOL! I agree!

ssbean said...

It's nobody's business what he or any other Olympian, or famous person for that matter does. Society and the media doesn't know when to let things go. I really do feel bad for the poor boy. He deserves his privacy.

Tricia said...

I totally agree. SNL's weekend up did a GREAT segment on this and "why it had to be such a big freaking deal". It was the "really?? with Seth" segment.. too funny.

Glennformer said...

The issue is whether young, impressionable kids, who shouldn't be doing ANY drugs, will do them because their bigger than life sports hero does drugs. It doesn't matter whether it is pot or booze or whatever.

I can't believe the response from mothers and mother want-to-be's who don't see the focus on protecting children. Would you be having a good laugh if the story was that Phelps got drunk at the party and killed someone's kid while driving home. Would you be saying "it's only beer--lighten up". That's why it's a big deal. My parents both stopped smoking when we kids got to be in 2nd and 3rd grade because they didn't want us to pick up the habit from them.

I can sympathize with anyone who is so unable to cope with life that they turn to drugs in whatever form (and I am for legalization of ALL drugs) but PROMOTING their use is another story. By the way, don't ever try to tell a "mellow" pothead, when they aren't high, that it makes them irritable when they aren't high--they'll bite your head off!

Mareike said...

Getting drunk and driving IS a big deal. Taking a hit off a bong is not. If the real interest is protecting children why would they plaster it all over the media?

Valerie said...

Hey tagged you for an award!

Not in the Water said...

I am surprised they are carrying on with this considering we don't know ENOUGH about the Rhianna/Chris Brown thing.

Hmmmm how are the troops in the Mid East? We'll never know as long as people are smoking up?!?!

And BTW glad the little one is ok with the penny...

nancy said...

lol. Him doing a bong hit at a party was ~not~ him "PROMOTING" drug use. He wasn't on a wheaties box smokin' a joint. Nor did he go out and kill anyone. I don't understand the analogy of him drinking and driving and killing someone to doing a bong hit. Hrm.

Mareike said...

I think I'll pack a bowl and ponder this.

April said...

I am SO done with hearing about this on the news. They need to let it go!

Sarah R said...

A little late to this, but someone posted it on my forum.

Did you see this from Joe Rogan's blog? :)

An open letter to Kellogg’s re: Michael Phelps
February 16, 2009

Dear, Kellogg’s.
I’m writing this letter to express my disappointment in your company in firing Michael Phelps as a spokesperson for your products because he was photographed while enjoying some marijuana.
I respectfully would like to communicate my opinion on this matter because I think it’s of great public interest.

First of all, although it is true that Mr. Phelps broke the law, I think any reasonably intelligent person would admit that it’s one of the most fucked up and corrupt laws that we have today in this country. Marijuana is relatively harmless and certainly far less dangerous than a host of other things that are not only legal but also readily available, like alcohol and prescription drugs. The only reason it remains illegal to this day is because it’s a plant and you can’t patent it and control it’s sale, and because if it were legal it would greatly affect the demand for a host of prescription drugs that rake in billions of dollars each year for pharmaceutical companies.

That’s it.

Marijuana has never killed anyone EVER in over 10,000 years of use. We’re not protecting people from themselves, we’re not saving the children - it’s just a horribly illogical law that is in place because of corruption and propaganda.

The fact that it’s against the law is just a disgusting reminder of how retarded our system is, not a reasonable reaction to a proven threat to society.

I have to say, this whole thing saddens me, because I personally would like to think that as Americans we’re better than this. These television news anchors will shake their heads at the thoughtless mistake Mr. Phelps had made by “smoking dope,” and then without even the tiniest sense of irony they will cut to a beer commercial.

This is supposed to be the land of the free and the home of the brave, right? We’re not supposed to be a nation of little bitches giving in to the whims of corrupt politicians and the pharmaceutical companies who’s interests they’re representing.

It’s 2009, and in this day and age with the incredible access to information that we have available there’s no fucking way that we should be allowing human beings to tell other human beings that they can’t do something that they enjoy that hurts no one including themselves.

THAT is madness. THAT is ignorant, and THAT is completely fucking un-American.

I don’t want to hear any of that, “he’s setting a bad example with the children” nonsense either, because we all know if he had a gin and tonic in his hand instead of a bong this would never have been an issue, even though every single study ever done has shown that marijuana is FAR less dangerous than alcohol.

Marijuana laws are a horrible waste of resources and law enforcement, and especially in this day and age with our economy in such horrible shape I believe the last thing we need to be doing is wasting tax payers’ money on any of this victimless bullshit.

I find your reactions to Mr. Phelps situation both ignorant and short sighted.
I think what would have been a far better response from Kellogg’s would be to support Mr. Phelps, and perhaps point out that maybe we as a society should take a closer look at the evidence and possibly reconsider our position on this misunderstood plant that so many of our productive citizens find useful.
Now, I’m sure if you really were running Kellogg’s and you were still reading my bullshit all the way down to this, you must be thinking, “Why the hell would we stick our necks out like that for pot smokers?”

And of course the answer to that question would be, because we buy your shit, motherfucker.
Do you guys even know your consumer statistics? Well, let me fill you in on some of my own personal scientific research on the subject, because I have been closely studying my own purchases for over 20 years, and I can tell you that I’ve been high 100% of the time I’ve bought your shit.
I mean, do you guys ever think about what you sell?
Pop tarts? Are you kidding me? I would be willing to bet that 50% of the people buying pop tarts are stoned out of their fucking minds.
Just to be perfectly clear on my position, I would like you to know that I enjoy your products. I think many of them are quite tasty, but lets be honest; you guys sell sugar-drenched shit that’s horrible for your body - in fact, it’s actually way worse for your body than pot - and you market this shit specifically to children.
You assholes go as far as putting lovable cartoon characters on the boxes just so that kids will beg their parents for it.

Now, I don’t want you to misunderstand my point, because I in no way want anything bad to happen to your company. Like I said, I genuinely enjoy your products.
There’s nothing quite like being stoned out of your mind at 2am watching a Chuck Norris movie and eating a bowl of fruit loops. Your company and its products have been a part of some very pleasurable moments in guilty eating, and I’m glad you’re around.
All I’m saying is that it’s high time (no pun intended) that you motherfuckers respect the stoner dollar. There’s WAY more of us than you might think, and we tend to get upset about dumb shit like this. There are millions of us, and if we decide that we don’t like a company, they’re going to feel it.
I think if you looked into it carefully, you would be surprised at how many undercover potheads there are out there. Pot smokers don’t all fit into the obvious, negative stereotypes; we come in all shapes and forms - including by the way, the form of the greatest fucking swimmer who ever lived, EVER.
Think about THAT shit for a second..
So in closing, I would like to ask you nice folks to please smarten the fuck up.
I would request that you check the calendar and note that it’s 2000 and fucking 9, and next time you think about getting all uppity about pot you might want to do a quick google search on the facts.

It’s 4:40am here in LA, and I’m going to wrap up this blog and to celebrate its completion I’m going to enjoy one of my personal favorite Kellogg’s products: Eggo waffles.

I’m gonna pop 4 of them bitches into the toaster, and then I’m gonna stuff the bong with some fine, American grown “Train Wreck” and sacrifice the sacred plant to the fire gods in tribute to the unjustly persecuted 8 time Olympian hero. Then I’m gonna get some butter, and I’m gonna smear it on those Eggos, I’m gonna cover them with maple syrup, and I’m going to eat the ever loving fuck out of them.
Good day, sirs.

Yours truly,

Joe Rogan.