Saturday, November 24, 2007

there's no shame in pooping.

Everyone poops. Great. If I need to talk about it (as in with a doctor, for example) I'm not embarrassed. I do like to keep it private for the most part though. I don't like a crowded bathroom. I'm not going to make it part of general chit chat at work. I'm not going to pretend it doesn't exist, but it's not on my top 5 things to discuss over a sandwich at lunch.

This is why I find no shame in a can of smell-good in the bathroom. Sometimes it's necessary and due to the fact I don't want to smell it in my own house, I keep a bottle of it, within sight, in my guest bathroom. But for some reason, it's not used correctly. And I just don't get it. If it needs to be used, spray it for just a second. Is that so hard? Apparently it is because I've noticed it's either ~not~ used when it should be or it's overused hardcore.

When it's not used - why? Does the person think they smell like roses? Does the person think spraying it admits to the act of pooping? (um, not spraying it is worse.) Does the person just not think about it at all?

And the over user. My good lord. Most sprays are strong. It does ~not~ need to be sprayed until the mist is literally visible in every square inch. In this case, I really don't know what's better. The smell itself or the smell of a french whore house. (I assume only whore houses in france are doused with perfume).

As I wrap this up, let me leave you with something that has horrified me for years. The act of smelling something happens because there are actual particles of the offending substance itself landing on your olfactory receptors. Yeah. When you smell shit, it's because you are literally breathing in teeny particles of shit. And ~this~ is why smells bother me.


jamie said...


ps i *love* all of the new pics

Swim said...

I laughed all the way through this post. It's the best laugh I've had all day. Although it's completely disgusting that we breathe in shit.

jenn said...

nothing is worse than the overspray. "french whore house"!! HA.

I am a fan of matches- even though it was proven they do nothing to the actual 'smell' particles on a mythbusters episode- i still ~think~ they do. and that's better for me!